The Kirkcaldys

Funny how things turn out isn't it. I was talking bout working in mcDonalds trongate the other day hen a girl I work with asked if I knew Jane Kirkcaldy. Turns out she is one of Janes best pals.

I don't remember any amusing stories about Jane unfortunately. Only remember that she was really nice and always a very cheery person. Oh and went out with Stuart "wee chunky" Horsburgh for an unelievable amount of time. She was even on the great Horsburgh boat when it sank.

Just now she is happily married to a Policeman and is now working as a contact lens optician

Her big brother Neil (on the left next to Elaine McLaren and Jane)- also a famous crewmember from McDonalds - is now a psychiatric nurse. I was always scared of Neil in McDonalds as I always got the feeling he wanted to kick my head in. I dont think he particularly disliked me just that he liked the thought of giving me a doing. I remember being in the backroom with him and his kind offer to "play a game" - you punch me in the arm then I get to punch you!! Considering I was a wimpy wee $hitebag I declined his offer and took off in case he decided to go first anyway. Met him years later at bellshill train station. cannae mind what he was doing at the time but he was very friendly to me and didnt seem to want to kill me. Which was a bit of a relief really.

The oldest McDonalds Kircaldy was Scott. He was already working in McDonalds at the time. He didnt really mix with the new staff but was bang on according to anyone who ever spok of him. Scott in now a car salesman and has two children.

Tommy Shaw's Stag Do!

No amount of therapy will ever let me forget Tommy Shaws Stag night in the Fox and hound. Apparantly he had more than one but he will never forget the McDonalds stag do!
Obviously had to be held in the Fox. Well there was a great turn out. At one point Matt Lowe went out the pub and Graeme Innes and a friend Pished in his pint. It was horrible. When Matt returned the whole pub was watching him. As soon as he picked up his pint there was a synchronised "look at your feet" throughout the whole pub. Matt drank some of the pint and said it tasted a bit funny. Not content with having him drink a bit of it Graeme Innes ordered Charlie the bar man to top it up so Matt would hoover the rest of it up. He seemed quite happy with it after that as well. Another reason not to leave your pint sitting alone if Graeme Innes is with you!!

Later on the night is a blur to me. I remember us all sitting and a variety of drinks being bought as rounds. At one pioint I was calling the then store manager Iain Mane a big concorde nose b*$tard. I couldn’t handle whiskey at the time and someone had got me one instead of a southern comfort which I had added to my pint of lager. When I tasted the drink I realised I didn’t like it and thought it would be a good idea to throw it at Tony O’Rourke (it seemed like a logical thing to do). I hit him right on his fancy jumper. He was well pissed. Threw a drink right back at me. Missed and hit Michelle Fenton’s brother who was a rather big boy. He was ready to kill Tony. Lucky for Tony everyone realised I had started it and poured their drinks over my head.

The plan was to tie Tommy up outside Bennetts with his trousers down. Rather than wait until we had walked round to Bennetts someone decided to grab as soon as we got outside the Fox. Which was a smashing idea as Tommy passed out due to the amount of drink. So did we let him off?? Nope. We had to carry him from the Fox round to Bennetts. I remember having a leg to carry and his arse scraping off the ground as we dragged him the 200 metres. Still passed out Tommy was tied to a lamp post with his trousers down and a Tshirt sporting a rude slogan like "I like big willies" or something

The next day I woke up with a "Minor" hangover and couldn’t quite figure out why my hair was all hard and sticky – it was due to all the booze poured on it the night before, what were you thinking??

When you Go will you send back a postcard from wherever

I was sifting through my box of McDonalds memoribilia (coming to a museum near you soon) and came accross some postcards that were sent to me by crewmembers. If you click on the postcard you will be able to get a larger image and read what it says.

Stacey Lee: Crete

Lynn Chaddock: Amsterdam

Fiona and Pamela: Iowa

Elaine Park: Corfu

Dave Falconer: Holland